Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Nothing to fear but fear itself ... what a load of bullshit...

I really don't know why they call them irrational fears.  As far as I can tell, most of them are perfectly rational.

A fear of heights?  Ask anyone who's fallen a significant distance whether that one is irrational!  Hell, ask anyone who's fallen down the stairs even!  That's not irrational, it's completely sensible.

A fear of death?  I don't see anything irrational about that one either.  We don't know what comes after death, so of course it's scary.  Anyone who says otherwise is just lying, or very very good at fooling themselves.

A fear of clowns?  Well, I think that one speaks for itself...

But some of us have fears which are a little more unusual than your typical fear of talking in public or dread of the dentist.  Take this woman for example.  Poor thing, she's been scarred since childhood, terrified of going near a toilet ever since she saw that scene in "Look Who's Talking 2" where the Mr Toilet Man wants the pee pee.  I suppose to a four year old it would be a horrifying prospect.

I feel for you, scaredy toilet woman.  I have a deep seated phobia that dates back to my childhood too.  I'm terrified of execution.

I know, it's kind of a weird one, especially given the fact that I live in a country that doesn't even HAVE execution, but it's true.  I've been scared of the idea of execution for years.  I can barely get through books that have it in them, and when there's a scene on TV or in a movie I end up huddled at the back of the couch, hugging myself and making weird little keening noises in the back of my throat.

Before you say that death isn't such an uncommon phobia, I should point out that it's not the death part that gets to me.  I can watch a movie with someone getting shot no problems at all.  But put a blindfold on them and make the shooter an executioner, and I have a melt down.

I always like to joke that maybe it's because I was executed in a past life, but I think the truth is probably much more prosaic than that.  Like the poor woman from the article, I too was scarred by television in my youth.

When I was about ten or eleven there was quite the uproar when a couple of Australians were executed in Malaysia for trafficking heroin.  Thanks to a combination of a sensitive temperament, an active imagination, and a television station showing rather graphic images (for a ten year old at least), I managed to freak myself the hell out.

And this, my friends, is why I will NEVER travel to Bali.

Of course I've heard of those places where they use fear immersion techniques to help you get over your fears, but I don't think they'd be a good idea for me.  If the only way to get over it is to have someone pretend to string me up or shove me in front of a firing squad, I think I'll pass.

But if anyone out there wants to help cure me of my fear of massages, chocolate and Jane Austen flicks, we'll I'm sure we could work something out.

53 comments:

  1. I completely understand the fear of clowns. While they do not abnormally frighten me, I do find them rather creepy. Why are they possibly supposed to be funny? I'm sure you'd be a little bothered if I started painting my face, wearing giant shoes and a red nose, and catering to children.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They're just so creepy! What are they hiding behind that face paint? Why do they need to disguise their identities?

      Delete
  2. Clowns are NOT funny. Period. They are creepy, freaky and perverted. Well, I don't know about the perverted part, but definitely creepy and freaky. Executions, huh? Well, I've never heard that one before but I can understand. I have a water phobia, sort of. I fear drowning. How could a fear immersion technique help for that one? Put me in the water til I nearly drown and then pull me out? I don't think so. Anyway, love this post, Kellie!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. People who do the whole immersion therapy are insane, in my opinion. I'd have thought something like that would only strengthen their fear!

      Delete
  3. I hate spiders, but we live in a brown recluse region, and those buggers are quite dangerous!

    I also fear margarine and Cool Whip. Two things made from oil and turned into fake dairy. How scary is that?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can understand your fear of margarine and cool whip. Are they dairy? Are they not? Where exactly to they fit on the food pyramid? Why are they pretending to be a food group that they don't really belong to? It's all very suspicious.

      Delete
    2. I definitely have a fear of eating something that isn't what it says it is: eg. Dairy Icecream made out of vegetable oil and powdered milk. I guess that is dairy in some sense, or it was at some point.

      Delete
  4. So funny but I understand your phobia. I have a fear of fish ever since I saw my brother in law get bit on the nipple by a fish in a lake. He screamed like a girl and his nipple was actually bleeding. I won't ever get in the water again unless it's a pool and that incident was about 28 years ago.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bit on the nipple! By a fish! Holy crap, I never even considered that one! I guess I'm never going swimming again.

      Delete
  5. I think I'd pass on being shoved in front of a firing squad too. It doesn't sound like the best way to spend a weekend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If they tried it, I'd probably have a mental break and they'd have to have me committed. I'm bad enough just watching it on TV.

      Delete
  6. Snakes and heights make me break out into a sweat for obvious reasons but one that I am always chided about is my fear of turtleneck sweaters - I am sure those horrible things can choke the life right out of you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I remember being terrified of those when I was a kid (we call them skivvies though). Mum would shove us into one of them and it'd feel like they were strangling you.

      Delete
  7. I'm with you on this! My biggest fears are flying, being on the ocean in a large ship (perhaps I saw Titanic too many times) and cockroaches! Big fear of drowning--I shudder every time we hit hurricane season here and they show big walls of water crashing against the shore. I also had some driving issues as well. Guess I'm not a good travel companion, huh?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is a lot of travel related phobias ... perhaps you should stick to staycations.

      Delete
  8. Is it systematic execution, like state-sponsored, or any kind of murder? What about zombie movies where they execute large numbers of zombies, does that freak you out?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, that doesn't freak me out. It only seems to be where it's state sponsored, although I'm a little more squicked out by things like gangland murders, probably thanks to the similarities.

      Delete
  9. I suppose a Green Mile reference would be too obvious. I am afraid of confined space, spiders, clowns, and Crocs. <---- not the animal the footwear

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Perfectly understandable. Crocs are horrifying! Whoever invented them has a special place in hell reserved for them ... where they have to wear a pair for the rest of eternity.

      Delete
  10. I was going to make a joke about roleplaying an execution, but thought better of it. Best to stick with the massage and chocolate aversion.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I thought so. I know I'll have success with those ones. I'd just end up with a psychotic episode if I roleplayed an execution.

      Delete
  11. All perfectly normal?....Ah Dr. Phil called, take a number.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooh, don't get me started on Dr Phil! That man is just awful! The way he treats people, all covered by his "I'm a psychologist, it's for your own good" attitude is appalling! No, Dr Phil, you don't act that way because you're a psychologist, you act that way because you're an asshole.

      Delete
  12. TV has a lot to answer for. I saw Alfred Hitchcock's movie "The Birds" on TV when I was small. Still terrified of birds flying around my head. Well, anything flying around my head, really. Butterflies, moths, gnats, etc.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I could definitely see being afraid of executions. I get pretty upset about that stuff. Like the end of Braveheart :( And especially that it's a true story. That will pop into my head and stay with me for days. And the book "My Brother Sam Is Dead". That stuff is unsettling and can leave a person feeling hopeless and scared for sure.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There's just something so ... cold blooded about it. It's worse than a normal murder, because it's done with that whole attitude of "We have the right to take your life, and everyone will be better off if you're dead."

      Delete
  14. I don't understand being afraid of things that can't kill you like bugs or shower curtains, but I try to be understanding. Being executed seems a rather logical fear.

    I have a very rational fear of sharks thanks to my dad who let me watch Jaws when I was six. But I keep that one in check by never going near water where a shark might be lurking (not easy when you live within 10 miles of the coast).

    My even bigger fear, however, is one that I nor anyone can avoid: aliens. I am skeptical about whether they have been here or not before but when they do show up? Doesn't matter if they are peaceful or not, havoc will ensue.

    Australia comes in at the number three spot of my fears - everything there will try to kill you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's true, the whole country is pretty deadly. It's frankly amazing that any of us live past the age of 5.

      Delete
  15. Okay, that clown picture is creeping me out. I've never liked clowns.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I can definitely understand your fear of executions.

    I'm afraid of drunks.....and Dial soap. Go figure!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can understand the drunks one, they're so bloody unpredictable, but dial soap?

      Delete
  17. Clowns are the worst ev-er. And Bali? I'm with you NO WAY NO WAY...... :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know it's probably illogical, but it seems that we're forever hearing how this Aussie or that Aussie got arrested in Bali and is now serving 20 years, if not the death penalty.

      Delete
  18. My wasp fear is completely rational because those bastards are out to get me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Of course it is. I'm sure they conspire together about how best to freak you out. Bloody wasps, always so sneaky.

      Delete
  19. You know they always tell you things like "It could be worse" and with this said, just think of being executed by a clown, you know there is nothing funny about that :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh god, executed by a clown! I wouldn't know whether to laugh or go catatonic.

      Delete
  20. I think everyone agrees on the clown front. Movies that scare the stuff out of me include: Dolls that come alive and try to kill you. (Chuckie...); Evil Children (That Orphan movie...all of the ones form the '80s, like Damien). Just typing this is making me hold my breath.
    I have to tell about two funny things: Frasier's TV episode called "BOO"(11th Season): Mini Synopsis: Frasier is treating a patient with a fear of clowns so decides to dress up as one as a form of therapy. However, he is also having to put up with his father constantly trying to scare him as well, so decides to play joke on Martin by leaping out from the bathroom dressed as a clown wielding a knife! This causes Martin to be rushed to hospital suffering from a mild cardiac event. HILARIOUS!
    Here's another funny quick one: U.S. Postal Service TV Commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzvcQmkhznw

    ReplyDelete
  21. Speaking for myself, deny me chocolate and I'll die soon enough.

    ReplyDelete
  22. My father could always remember that my sister and I had strong feelings on clowns so when he went away he would regularly buy us a clown. Unfortunately our strong feeling was fear. So Dad bought us presents we were scared of. Parenting win there.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Lol Thank you for an interesting read Kellie! :) I feel for you with your phobia. It's interesting the way the mind works, isn't it? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, it's definitely funny what you'll pick up on as a kid.

      Delete
  24. I have a fear of bobtails! It is weird cause I don't mind snakes but bobtails freak me out!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hate snakes, but have no particular feelings towards bobtails. That's probably because we have snakes here, but not bobtails. Then again, we don't have execution here either... I guess that's where the irrational comes into it :D

      Delete
  25. I like to tell people that my fear of sharks is completely rational. Have you SEEN how many teeth they have? Then my friends remind me that I only swim in pools and that still being nervous in the deep end is pretty irrational. They might have a point.

    Also, my parents were clowns when I was growing up. Play dates could end up being pretty traumatic for my friends...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wonder how many of your friends now have a clown phobia thanks to your parents :D

      Delete
  26. Lol I KNEW that being afraid of everything wasn't irrational!! :) Lately (and this may sound ridiculous) every time I head down to the Gold Coast or am anywhere near sea-line I freak out (completely - like, panic attack) about tsunamis! Our annual beach holiday has become a complete nightmare for me - listening to the sounds of water while I go to sleep? - Absolute terror! Hearing about what's happened in Indonesia, Samoa and Japan over the last few years must've really had some HUGE impact on my subconscious! And I'm with you - execution sounds AWFUL!!

    ReplyDelete
  27. You have a real talent for cheapest wow

    gold
    putting your thoughts into clear, original content. Your article is easy to read and understand. You have

    brought forth some buy world of

    warcraft gold
    really good points that I agree with and appreciate.

    ReplyDelete